islandhippy

We tend to post funny stuff on the blog and spare readers (if we have any) the serious issues but the past week has also been really tough on mother and daughter (and dad) and we would like to share it in the hope somebody else might benefit from it. Our main problem was breastfeeding. Although we read half a dozen books on pregnancy and postnatal baby care, we simply didn't realise that so many people encounter breastfeeding difficulties. We presumed that after baby drops out you slap a nipple in its mouth and you're done. This probably does work with some fortunate couples but not for us.

We specifically requested the obstetrician give the baby to Sandy immediately after the birth but of course there was nobody there to show us how to get the baby to latch on (said obstetrician was busy with needle and thread as episiotomies are standard procedure at this hospital). Baby was then taken away for an hour of tests and when she was returned to us in the ward in the late evening we tried again to get her to latch on. The lactation specialist was not available until the following morning and we couldn't get the baby in the right position and left the baby on the breast for too long resulting in very painful nipples which soon cracked and bled. Since we couldn't breastfeed that night, the baby was fed by cup (not with a bottle, which could cause nipple confusion) in the hospital nursery. The following morning we requested to see the lactation specialist but as she was the only one on duty in the country's biggest maternity hospital she could only spare us ten minutes. We tried in vain to breastfeed over the next day and a half in the hospital and before we were discharged we asked the nursery staff to teach us how to cup feed the baby so we could fall back on this at home if breastfeeding was still not possible.

Back at home we naturally had no luck and the whole situation was becoming pretty desperate. Cup feeding a wriggling baby is not easy and we were having to resort to baby formula. At the same time we were getting increasingly concerned about engorgement and mastisis. The postnatal home visit nurse arranged through the hospital was a waste of money -- she wasn't a midwife -- and we realised we would need professional help very soon. To make matters worse, all of this happened on Day 4 when the postnatal blues paid us a visit. We called the hospital only to learn they had just one lactation specialist for the whole hospital and she wasn't on duty until Monday (it was now Saturday morning). After consulting current and former neighbours (Rani and Katrina, thanks for the advice and support) and family in England (Holly and Mum) we were encouraged to contact the Breastfeeding Mothers' Support Group (Singapore). On Saturday afternoon I gave them a call and they immediately put us at ease by explaining that not only do many people have this problem but also that there are private lactation consultants in Singapore who do home visits. We took down the number of one nurse, gave her a quick call and within an hour (on a late Saturday afternoon) she was at the house.

I won't advertise this lady's contact details on the blog but if anybody would like her email or tel number, please email me. She is a UK-trained Sinagaporean RN and midwife, who worked in several countries before returning to Singapore to work at one of the top private hospitals here. As well as being an RN and midwife, and holding a BA, she also has a masters in education and we learnt more from her in one hour of preliminary discussions than we did from all our discussions with our obstetrician or the hospital paediatrician and lactation specialist. This new lactation consultant spent a couple of hours with us on Saturday evening and again on Sunday and Monday. She had to solve the breast problem, wean the baby off formula, ban bottles from the house (they are so easy to use that it's no surprise people give up breastfeeding) and teach the baby how to latch on. Apparently the majority of mothers in Singapore give up breastfeeding very soon after leaving hospital due to lack of support and advice so we knew this was our only chance to make it work.

It's now Tuesday and while we're not 100% sure we've cracked it, we are very positive we can make this work. Last night was our first pure breastfeeding night and the baby (whose name will be revealed tomorrow after I register the birth!) seemed to feed and sleep well. A huge huge huge thank you to everybody who emailed and called with advice and support. (Our final goal is to produce enough milk not just for baby but to be able to join Rani in the breast milk cheese business!)

UPDATE (12 months later): Sandy was able to breastfeed Olive, without resorting to formula, for one whole year! Well done Sandy and Olive!